![\"\"](\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/NLLE3Rl.jpg?resize=640%2C360\")
<\/p>\nDanville could pay back all of that Tobacco Commission money within a year if the police would start writing fire lane violation tickets at the ABC store in Nor-Dan Shopping Center.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Woo! It’s Saturday! Gotta get my liquor for Saturday night! Fire lane? Ain’t no fire here so I’ll just park right in front of the store.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Oh my. We’ve got a DOUBLE PARKING JERK WINNER!<\/p>\n
As the bells clang and the siren goes Whoop-Whoop-Whoop, I’ll say “This is SouthsideCentral reminding you to have your future Parking Jerks spayed or neutered!”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Danville could pay back all of that Tobacco Commission money within a year if the police would start writing fire lane violation tickets at the ABC store in Nor-Dan Shopping Center.<\/p>\n
[…]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[107],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-9856","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-parking-jerk-of-the-day","odd"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/pwqFk-2yY","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":false,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":10048,"url":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/2014\/08\/23\/parking-jerk-of-the-day-8232014\/","url_meta":{"origin":9856,"position":0},"title":"Parking Jerk of the Day! (8\/23\/2014)","author":"SouthsideCentral","date":"August 23, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"It's Saturday. It's Danville. It's Walmart. Are we going to find a winner for today's Parking Jerk of the Day award? Let's take a look at today's submission... Woah. We've done it again! It's another DOUBLE PARKING JERK OF THE DAY WINNER! CLANG CLANG CLANG WHOOP WHOOP WHOOP CLANG CLANG\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Parking Jerk of the Day"","block_context":{"text":"Parking Jerk of the Day","link":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/category\/featurescentral\/parking-jerk-of-the-day\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/auzJgkG.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/auzJgkG.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/auzJgkG.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":33648,"url":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/2016\/08\/04\/parking-jerk-of-the-day-8416\/","url_meta":{"origin":9856,"position":1},"title":"Parking Jerk of the Day! (8\/4\/16)","author":"SouthsideCentral","date":"August 4, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Parking Jerks have their own sense of priorities. It's been a case of \"Actual Reality before Virtual Reality\" here at SouthsideCentral this week, but we're still trying to publish daily content to keep our readers smiling. That being said, let's head to Danville's Riverside Shopping Center and see what's been\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Parking Jerk of the Day"","block_context":{"text":"Parking Jerk of the Day","link":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/category\/featurescentral\/parking-jerk-of-the-day\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/1Kljg0I.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/1Kljg0I.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/1Kljg0I.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/1Kljg0I.jpg?resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":32751,"url":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/2016\/07\/18\/parking-jerks-of-the-day-71816\/","url_meta":{"origin":9856,"position":2},"title":"Parking Jerks of the Day! (7\/18\/16)","author":"SouthsideCentral","date":"July 18, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"If you think our Parking Jerk of the Day feature is stupid and a invasion of privacy, we understand. So, we're going to upset you twice as much today just because we can. Heh. This one comes from a member of the SouthsideCentral family, which makes it even better. We're\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Parking Jerk of the Day"","block_context":{"text":"Parking Jerk of the Day","link":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/category\/featurescentral\/parking-jerk-of-the-day\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/EWxpt4T.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/EWxpt4T.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/EWxpt4T.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/EWxpt4T.jpg?resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":29264,"url":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/2016\/05\/31\/parking-jerk-of-the-day-53116\/","url_meta":{"origin":9856,"position":3},"title":"Parking Jerk of the Day! (5\/31\/16)","author":"SouthsideCentral","date":"May 31, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Our submission today is a small photo, but it's one of those situations that just infuriates the hell out of me. And it should draw the same reaction from you. This one comes from the Food Lion in Danville's Ballou Park Shopping Center. Let's take a look. It doesn't matter\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Parking Jerk of the Day"","block_context":{"text":"Parking Jerk of the Day","link":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/category\/featurescentral\/parking-jerk-of-the-day\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/0c4QgnC.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":33442,"url":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/2016\/08\/01\/parking-jerk-of-the-day-8116\/","url_meta":{"origin":9856,"position":4},"title":"Parking Jerk of the Day! (8\/1\/16)","author":"SouthsideCentral","date":"August 1, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Let's kick the month of August off by having a nice snack of low-hanging fruit. Yep, Parking Jerk time! We're at Walmart. BUT BUT BUT BUT it's the Walmart in Martinsville! See, that's a plot twist for you. Let's see what I found... Um. Wow. Parked on the shopping cart\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Parking Jerk of the Day"","block_context":{"text":"Parking Jerk of the Day","link":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/category\/featurescentral\/parking-jerk-of-the-day\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/N46uX5C.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/N46uX5C.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/N46uX5C.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/N46uX5C.jpg?resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":88943,"url":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/2018\/05\/23\/parking-jerk-of-the-day-5-23-18\/","url_meta":{"origin":9856,"position":5},"title":"Parking Jerk of the Day! (5\/23\/18)","author":"SouthsideCentral","date":"May 23, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"If we're going to get SouthsideCentral back up to speed, then we have to do a PJotD! This one was submitted from the parking lot at the Centerville Food Lion in South Boston. Let's see what we have. Oh my. Let's look at the criteria... Completely within the No Parking\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/fr6n5xa.jpg?fit=383%2C287&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9856","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=9856"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9856\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":9858,"href":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9856\/revisions\/9858"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=9856"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=9856"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=9856"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}