![](\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/qWft9Uq.jpg?resize=640%2C480\")
<\/p>\nWe can’t screw up a Parking Jerk of the Day. Or can we? What if it’s already screwed up? You can’t blame us for that.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Stop me if you’ve heard this opening line before. We’re heading to Danville’s Walmart!<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Well then. Um, let’s start the analysis. The An argument can be made for contributory negligence here. Since this is now a judicial matter (no, it’s really not), let’s send this one to our panel of judges.<\/p>\n And we get a rare two-part ruling! First, the No. We don’t know what in the hell happened here in this article, either. But it’s fun!<\/p>\n We can’t screw up a Parking Jerk of the Day. Or can we? What if it’s already screwed up? You can’t blame us for that.<\/p>\n […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[107],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-32634","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-parking-jerk-of-the-day","odd"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/pwqFk-8um","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":false,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":18048,"url":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/2016\/04\/01\/parking-jerk-of-the-day-4116\/","url_meta":{"origin":32634,"position":0},"title":"Parking Jerk of the Day! (4\/1\/16)","author":"SouthsideCentral","date":"April 1, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"I didn't need your submissions for Parking Jerk of the Day this time. I've busted this Parking Jerk all by myself. We're at Danville's South Market Street. It's a one-way street, so we've got parallel parking on both sides. Let's take a look at what I found. Well then. Let's\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Parking Jerk of the Day"","block_context":{"text":"Parking Jerk of the Day","link":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/category\/featurescentral\/parking-jerk-of-the-day\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/Q2Jlf5d.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/Q2Jlf5d.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/Q2Jlf5d.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/Q2Jlf5d.jpg?resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":32155,"url":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/2016\/06\/30\/parking-jerk-of-the-day-63016\/","url_meta":{"origin":32634,"position":1},"title":"Parking Jerk of the Day! (6\/30\/16)","author":"SouthsideCentral","date":"June 30, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"You can still be a Parking Jerk even if you don't take up multiple spaces in a parking lot. We're heading to downtown Danville for today's nominee. Let's see what we have... Well, this doesn't meet our normal Parking Jerk criteria, but we like to have special cases. Let's analyze\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Parking Jerk of the Day"","block_context":{"text":"Parking Jerk of the Day","link":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/category\/featurescentral\/parking-jerk-of-the-day\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/eGKx518.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/eGKx518.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/eGKx518.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/eGKx518.jpg?resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":22891,"url":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/2016\/04\/25\/parking-jerk-of-the-day-42516\/","url_meta":{"origin":32634,"position":2},"title":"Parking Jerk of the Day! (4\/25\/16)","author":"SouthsideCentral","date":"April 25, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"It's the last full week of campaigning for Danville City Council elections, so let's take a breather from that action. Let's point & laugh at a Parking Jerk of the Day! This one comes in from an anonymous submission, with the only words saying \"Danville\". Hey, that's good enough for\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Parking Jerk of the Day"","block_context":{"text":"Parking Jerk of the Day","link":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/category\/featurescentral\/parking-jerk-of-the-day\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/zLSmH2v.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/zLSmH2v.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/zLSmH2v.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/zLSmH2v.jpg?resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":27831,"url":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/2016\/05\/22\/parking-jerk-of-the-day-52216\/","url_meta":{"origin":32634,"position":3},"title":"Parking Jerk of the Day! (5\/22\/16)","author":"SouthsideCentral","date":"May 22, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"My mother always pronounced it \"EYE-talian\" and that was quite irritating to the ears. Anyway, there's an Italian flavor in today's Parking Jerk of the Day. This submission came in from Danville's Riverside Shopping Center. Let's see what we have. Let's see what we have here. Clearly over the lines.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Parking Jerk of the Day"","block_context":{"text":"Parking Jerk of the Day","link":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/category\/featurescentral\/parking-jerk-of-the-day\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/lgmGpWN.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/lgmGpWN.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/lgmGpWN.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/lgmGpWN.jpg?resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":11444,"url":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/2014\/12\/06\/parking-jerk-of-the-day-1262014\/","url_meta":{"origin":32634,"position":4},"title":"Parking Jerk of the Day! (12\/6\/2014)","author":"SouthsideCentral","date":"December 6, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"That headline is misleading. We've got Parking JerkS... and they're in the same place. Saturday is Parking Jerk day, and one of our contributors has sent in a good one. Let's go to Danville's Biscuitville location on Riverside Drive. Behold Parking Jerk #1! That's a pretty clear award winner. But\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Parking Jerk of the Day"","block_context":{"text":"Parking Jerk of the Day","link":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/category\/featurescentral\/parking-jerk-of-the-day\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/w8zKwoq.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/w8zKwoq.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/w8zKwoq.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":10935,"url":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/2014\/11\/02\/parking-jerk-of-the-day-1122014\/","url_meta":{"origin":32634,"position":5},"title":"Parking Jerk of the Day! (11\/2\/2014)","author":"SouthsideCentral","date":"November 2, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"We're heading to South Boston for today's Parking Jerk. Let's see what our Roving Reporters have found today... All right, let's analyze this one. Badly parked. Parked in a striped area. Points for a handicapped parking space. Bonus points for combining the striped area AND the handicapped parking place. To\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Parking Jerk of the Day"","block_context":{"text":"Parking Jerk of the Day","link":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/category\/featurescentral\/parking-jerk-of-the-day\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/p6HPCoA.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/p6HPCoA.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/p6HPCoA.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/p6HPCoA.jpg?resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/32634","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=32634"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/32634\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":32635,"href":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/32634\/revisions\/32635"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=32634"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=32634"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.southsidecentral.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=32634"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}Giant Land Yacht<\/del> car clearly meets the Parking Jerk standards, because it’s over the line and also parked at an angle. But we note that Walmart’s shopping cart return thingy (that’s the technical term for it, by the way) seems to have exploded. Sorta like the belt of your uncle at the family reunion that always eats too much. That thing could kill somebody when it blows, baby.<\/p>\nbig-ass SS Titanic<\/del> car is ruled a Parking Jerk of the Day for clear reasons. And second, we’re awarding a Special Parking Jerk of the Day award to the Walmart shopping cart return thingy for blowing up into a second parking space.<\/p>\n![](\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.imgur.com\/fr6n5xa.jpg?resize=383%2C287\")
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"